This will come as a shock to no one but I find Facebook to be insufferable. I still have my FB account but I hardly ever use it anymore. I deleted the app from my phone and when I log on at work it’s mostly just to talk to people on messenger.
Facebook is filled with a bunch of annoying, stupid people talking about shit that no one cares about. (It’s also a constant reminder that everyone and their mother is getting engaged except for me but that’s another post altogether.)
There are certain topics that people love to voice their opinions to whoever will listen. These are topics that no one actually cares about yet people will still ramble on about. Here are some topics that if you ever feel the need to tell someone about quickly shove a sock in your mouth and lock yourself in a closet for a couple of hours because nobody cares.
Dieting – So do you want to hear what I had for lunch today? Wanna hear how many calories I consumed? No! No! Literally no one wants to hear about the healthy, green shit you had for lunch. If you ate at some amazing new restaurant that specializes in unique tacos, by all means please tell me about it. I’d love to hear about these tacos doused in hot sauce and guacamole. But if you want to tell me about the oatmeal you had for breakfast and the salad with dressing on the side for lunch, I’ll take a pass. Eat your salad, be sad about it, and shut up.
Exercising – This tends to coincide with the dieting phenomenon. You start eating salads and going to the gym and suddenly you won’t shut the hell up. There are those people who genuinely believe that if you don’t let FB know you went to the gym then the workout doesn’t really count. All those calories you burned are for nothing because you forgot to check in. For shame!
Dreams – People LOVE talking about their dreams. They love telling a person every little detail about their dream and then asking what the dream could possibly mean. So in your dream you were a giraffe and you made out with the human version of Joe Biden. You want me to try to make sense of that? I dunno, maybe it means that you’re a freaking weirdo. But wanna know what I do know? I know that I don’t care about what you saw in your dreams while you were sleeping. We’re all narcissistic. The only time someone wants to hear about what happened in your dreams is if you dreamed about them. If that’s not the case, keep it to your dream diary.
Politics – #FeeltheBern #MakeAmericaGreatAgain #DoesHillaryEvenHaveACatchphrase #ShutUp #NobodyGivesAShitWhoYoureVotingFor
Politics is one of the main reasons I needed to delete my FB app and minimize the amount of time I spent on the shitty site. This political season in America has been especially nauseating and it seems to have brought out the worst in people. (People that I normally love and cherish.) I never realized before how many of my friends and family are political experts. It was quite the shock to me. News Flash: None of you are political experts and most of you actually know nothing about politics. So please kindly keep your political views to yourself because NOBODY CARES!
*Please note that none of this applies to me when it comes to blogging. I recently booked a trip to Miami so I’ll have plenty of tales about my attempts at dieting and exercising. I may bring Throwback Thursday back just so I can tell you about the dream I had where 50 Cent tried to kill me. (This is a very real dream that still haunts me to this day.) And if Donald Trump somehow becomes president this November, there will be plenty of bitching from me.