There should be a second part to that title which should be: As Long as It’s for the Right Reasons. However, that was way too long of a title. But in actuality the blog post you’re about to read is titled: There’s Nothing Wrong with Wanting a Wedding as Long as It’s for the Right Reasons.
As you all know, I got engaged this year. After we got engaged, the fiance and I sat down to talk about what we want as far as a wedding goes. There was a big part of us that didn’t want to have a wedding at all. Weddings are insanely expensive. Even if you try to budget and DIY, it can still really add up. After much debate and discussion, we ultimately decided that a wedding was something we wanted to have. The thought of having all our family members and close friends together for a big party swayed us.
As soon as we came to an agreement that we were having a wedding, the planning began. Of course, I turned to the Internet cause where else would I start my journey? As I was reading article after article about wedding tips, tricks, trends, etc., I also read the comments because I am a glutton for punishment. (I have learned time and time again that Internet comments are filled with the most miserable human beings but I can never seem to avoid reading them.) Some of the comments were helpful – newlyweds talking about what they did to bring their wedding together. Then there were a bunch of comments from people who appear to hate weddings yet feel the need to not only read articles about weddings, but also comment on them.
So many of the comments went like this. “Why would you have a wedding?” “Weddings are a complete waste of money!” “Save your money and spend it on literally anything else.”
A part of me can get the sentiment. I do believe that some people go overboard with weddings. If you have to take out a loan for your wedding, then there’s seriously something wrong and you should scale back a bit. But the comments, and even some of the articles, read as though anyone who even considers having a wedding is an idiot. And I say, there’s nothing wrong with wanting a wedding. And I am not just saying that as someone who will be having a wedding next year.
Just make sure that you are having a wedding for the right reason. It’s fine to want a big poofy dress or a raw bar overflowing with shrimp and oysters. Get those frilly chair covers and splurge on a photo booth. But remember that the main point of the day is to marry your forever partner. It’s to make a commitment with someone in front of all your nearest and dearest. The party is only one day. After all the guests have gone home, the food has been eaten, and your dress has been put away, you’re left with a marriage. If that’s not the most important thing on the day of your wedding, then you’re doing it wrong and getting married for the wrong reasons.
Have a wedding. Have the kind of wedding you’ve dreamed about forever. Just remember the wedding is about you and your partner, and not just about your dream Pinterest board.
“glutton for punishment”–me, too! Awfully wise words you offer. Here’s another reason for having a wedding,not necessarily an over-the-top bash: I once read that couples who commit to an event and then saying their vows in the presence of others tend to feel more of a commitment about said vows, so it’s not so easy to bail at the first little thing.They’re more likely to try to work things out. Don’t know if that necessarily holds up, but seems logical–especially if they follow your advice. Congrats and best wishes an all that jazz!
I never read that but it kinda makes sense. Thank you!
At one wedding I attended, the fellow conducting the service told the audience that as friends and family of the couple and as witnesses to this exchange of vows, our commitment was to be there through the future to support them in their marriage. That extra support can be another good reason to have a wedding.
Aww that’s really sweet. Bringing my family and friends together with his family and friends is one of the main reasons I want to have a wedding. I love the mending of two families that marriage creates.
LOVE this post so much. I loved having a wedding because I did like that everyone I loved was in the same place at once. I also liked the aftermath of reading cards and well-wishes of friends and family. It’s definitely not a waste, but I do agree that some people go way overboard and it’s not worth going into debt over. I chose 2 priorities (my dress and a photographer) and used more money on those than anything else. I can’t wait to hear more about your planning, and then y’alls life together. Have so much fun planning and please keep us posted! You will not regret having a wedding. 🙂
So far besides the venue itself, I’ve spent the most on my dress. I have always loved wedding dresses. So once we decided we were having a wedding, I knew I was going to go all out on my dress and the exact one I wanted. Luckily, I am using my sister’s veil so I’m saving money there. I will definitely be writing a lot as the planning goes along.
Hey girl! I took a break from blogging so am finally catching up on my comments and saw this. That is so freaking exciting; I cannot wait to see your dress! Seeing the bride is always one of my favorite parts about a wedding. 🙂 Please do keep writing! I’ll be living vicariously though you haha.
Hey! Welcome back! I cannot wait to finally share my dress with everyone!
Totally went over my head that you got engaged– belated congratulations! As for weddings themselves, it’s the couple’s choice to want either a lavish or low-key one. But I would hesitate if it’d require a loan, as you wrote, as well as if it becomes more of a stressful affair than an enjoyable one (there’s a thing called “bridezillas” for a reason!). No matter how big or small the wedding is, I hope you enjoy yours– keep us updated!
Thank you! I know that planning any sort of event will get stressful at times, but I am trying to make this planning thing as low-key as possible. I don’t care about most of the current wedding trends. I just want it to be a fun party.
I’m also a chronic comment reader, I can’t stay away!! I always go back and forth between ooooh I want a wedding and a beautiful white dress and oh…I could do a lot of stuff with that money. But if anyone wants a wedding, they should have one. It’s an important celebration and the couple deserves all the love and happiness and a night to celebrate that!
I definitely went back and forth as well. It is a lot of money, even if you do it cheap. I think that after my wedding, a part of me may regret spending all the money. But overall, I think the regret of not having a wedding would have been far greater.
Congratulations on the engagement. ♡ Commenters (besides on WordPress) are all trolls. There’s no better way to prove & celebrate love like a wedding!
Congratulations 🎉❣️👏 on the wedding
Wishing you a very happy life with your choosing one
Thank you!!! 🙂
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