I Have an Excellent Memory Until…

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So I am known for having a good memory. I have one friend who comes to me when she can’t remember details about her own past. My memory is so good that I’ve actually pretended that I didn’t remember some very small detail so I didn’t come across as weird. Remembering that you wore a red sweater with polka dots when we went to dinner five years ago comes across as stalkerish. It’s not. I just really remember everything, until I don’t.

I was reminded of this earlier this month when I was so confused when it was 5PM and pitch black outside. Every friggen November I forget about the effects of daylight saving time and am completely shocked that it’s so dark! Where is the sun and who took it? My memory works that way sometimes. I’ll remember what I had for breakfast this time three years ago but then I forget about an event that occurs every year.

The same thing happens with these other following events. My memory suddenly goes out the window!

I always forget how much alcohol is enough. My alcohol limit has been tested so many times in my adult life. How much wine is too much wine? Well I suddenly can’t remember. Maybe another glass will help jog my memory.

I always forget that I am going to want the snacks tomorrow. Every time I go food shopping, I just buy rabbit food. I don’t even walk down the snacks aisle cause I’m totally gonna be healthy for the entire week. I forget that every single time I go shopping I regret that I didn’t get any snacks. Then I just wind up going out and eating junk food and spending more money. Just buy the damn box of Oreo’s when you’re at the store.

I always forget just how tired I am in the morning. I love putting things off until the morning. I don’t need to make lunch now; I can do it tomorrow. The shower will still be there in the morning and it’ll help wake me up. HA! I tell myself this at night, forgetting just how tired I am when my alarm goes off. Twenty snoozes later and I’m dirty with no lunch.

I always forget just how lazy I can be. I always make elaborate plans for myself while at work. I’m gonna come home and cook dinner and go for a walk and read and maybe start that yoga video I’ve been eyeing on Amazon. Then I get home and do nothing! Excuse me, it’s not nothing. I do watch a lot of TV but never a yoga video. Work me forgets how lazy after-work me can be.

I always forget how friggen cold the winter gets. I have lived in New York my entire life. That’s 33 winters. It’s cold. It’s always cold. But for some reason the first time the temperature drops below 20, I am shocked. And freezing. I never know where my gloves or hats are because I forgot that winter comes every single year.

I always forget how out of shape I am. If someone asks me if I like hiking, I would answer “yes.” If I was still on a dating site, I’d most likely list hiking as a hobby. I genuinely do like hiking. When you reach the top of a mountain, it’s so incredibly rewarding. But going up the mountain, is the absolute worst! I am so out of shape. I always forget how strenuous climbing up a mountain can be. And while I’m doing it, I usually want to turn back 57 times.

5 comments

  1. I have been working the same job for a couple years. I have days where I forget how to do my job. I have to go ask a supervisor how to do something I do every single day because that day I forgot how to do it

  2. Funny you mentioned memory. I have a friend who can remember every detail of his life as if it just happened. There is an actual medical name for it. About five or six years ago he was on 60 Minutes. Forget about arguing details. You’ll lose every time. 🙂

  3. Oh, how I identify with this post. btw, my husband and son are always teasing my daughter and me when we start talking about times past. They know that sooner or later we’ll be talking about what we were wearing on any given day. Yes, we have that kind of memory, too!

  4. I totally wish I had a memory like you, I have a friend that I always can ask about my past, too, & she will remember every single detail. I’ll be like “who? Me? I did that?” Lol.

    #1-#4 are all too relatable for me. 😂 Too funny. I loved this post!

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