When you start dating someone, you’re going to find yourself doing a lot of questioning. “Does this person like me?” “What exactly are they looking for?” “Am I coming on too strong?” “When should I sleep with them?” “Should I have ‘the talk’ or should I just wait it out?” So. Many. Questions.
You are going to turn to every outlet available to find the answers to these questions. Do a quick Google search of “When should I sleep with the person I’m dating?” and it will turn up millions of results. And each article you find will have a different response. Three dates. Five Dates. Three months. Marriage. Any situation you find yourself in, I guarantee someone else has been in that exact same position. Some other person has found themselves dealing with a person who doesn’t respond to texts fast enough or went from texting every day to completely MIA overnight. And I bet they even wrote a blog post about it to help the next person figure out how to handle it.
Aside from the always helpful Internet, there are real life people to turn to when your dating life gets a bit tricky. I know for myself my friends are always there with a helpful, “Fuck him. I hate him and he’s not worth the trouble.” They really mean well. They just want to help you out and don’t want to see you get hurt.
Well luckily your favorite blogger is here so you don’t have to turn to the Internet or real life people anymore. I’m here to hit you with some real truth. I have got all the dating advice you’ll ever need. Once you read this you’ll never have to take another “But what does this text really mean?” quiz ever again.
Here is the number one dating rule that everyone needs to follow:
1. Don’t follow any dating rules. Don’t listen to a stupid article that describes the proper way to act with someone that you’re dating. Do whatever you feel is right for your relationship and whatever makes you comfortable.
Your mind must be officially blown right now. But what about the rules??? Well lovely readers, I kindly say fuck the rules! You want to bang on the first date, go right ahead! You want to wait until you feel completely comfortable, no matter how long that may take, then do that.
Relationships and dating are not one size fits all. In the end of the day, it’s just you and that one other person involved in the situation. If you rely on strangers from the Internet or your friends to constantly dictate how to proceed with your relationship, then you’re doing it wrong.
However I will give you just one little piece of advice, even though I just said don’t listen to strangers from the Internet: When it comes to relationships and dating, you really need to follow your instincts and do what feels right for you. Don’t overthink sending a text or asking to hang out. Don’t over-analyze ever single text you receive. Plenty of times people really do just mean what they say and there isn’t some hidden code in a “Hey, what’s up?” text. But the second you find yourself in a situation that makes you feel uncomfortable or badly about yourself, then you need to back away.
Yeah, you pretty much make your own rules. Sounds like a head explosion to me.
Couldn’t agree more!
This is good. I would add that some people seem to need some reminders on general courtesy guidelines, which in my opinion are the only “rules” you should follow. Let’s be real – if a guy decides to judge you because you wanted to bang on the first date, good thing you found out NOW so you can cut him loose. Or keep him around as just a fuck buddy – your choice.
Yea, I used to really stress about the whole sex thing when I was dating someone. I never wanted to do it too soon cause of what he may think of me. But now I’ve realized that if a guy is going to judge a girl based solely on when they’ve slept together then he’s the problem.
“But now I’ve realized that if a guy is going to judge a girl based solely on when they’ve slept together then he’s the problem.”
Exactly. Incidentally, many of those guys who are sooo busy judging are most certainly not too busy to make time for a semi-regular FWB relationship. And then they get all disappointed when you move on to greener (read: less judgmental) pastures. Maybe they could try fixing their own attitudes?
(Insert Kermit the Frog “but that’s none of my business” meme here.)
Reblogged this on Surviving Online Dating: and commented:
Cursing and all, this chick writes like a boss!!! Love it
Much needed advice!
Thanks for the reblog!
You’re welcome. Your blog is all kinds of awesome!
YESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!! Just so much YESSSSSSSSS!!!!! Now if I can only follow that kick-ass advice…;)
It’s so much easier said than done. Even I have some problem following the rule.
Great post. When I first began dating again after a long-long-long relationship, I wasn’t very discerning about sex. Then I got the advice “Don’t sleep with anyone you’re not in love with.” I have found this soul-enhancing advice for me. Probably isn’t good for everyone, but it’s good for me.
That’s the thing about dating. Everyone should just do whatever works for them.